[ Her eyes move up, resting on his for a second before she gives a soft smile. Her eyes crinkle, but they don't shine with any of her usual energy. ]
Stupid...you're the one who was crying. Isn't it natural I'd ask? [ His long lost sister was before his eyes, wasn't she? Sara leans back against the elevator wall, cocking her head as the smile drops. There's distress behind thoughtfulness. Nothing about her behavior is innately suspicious but it is...wooden, like someone going through the motions. Shock, perhaps. ]
I suppose it was... I'm glad...really. It was nice to see Kanna after so long, even if I was dead. I hope she does well, whereever she is.
[ The lights above them are blinding, but Sara would personally prepare to stare at them for the duration of the trip rather then think anything. This doesn't...change anything. ]
If this is the worst that I can imagine, maybe I am really too stupidly optimistic for my own good?
[He is not crying ok it's just raining indoors shut up.]
You know, I kept thinking about it back then. Over and over... how people could just listen to you. I think I'm starting to get an idea.
[They were falling for quite a while, the elevator's slow grind up is going to take even longer. He moves from the door, putting a splayed hand up as he passes her and leans over to pick up the laptop from the floor, returning to his position, swiping the dust off it, and tilting it back and forth with the wince-look of someone who knows the fans are probably fucked now. Looks like Kai's... he had taken good care of it, it seemed. Kanna... her idea wouldn't have worked if it wasn't already meticulously clean. He cracks it open for a quick look, the front edge pressed against his middle.]
[Her eyes do hurt, but they're dry. They're so dry its painful, and if they water a little from the light, thats nobody's business. It's raining. But Sou's answers aren't what she expects. What she hoped for? A tad to...sharp. Her eyes flick down to him, and for a second, its there. A pure, unguarded moment of panic. ]
I didn't...do anything? [ She's picking every word so carefully. He can't know about Ranmaru, or Midori, but somehow she feels like he does. It feels like an accusation. She can still see it, the way Sou looked at her with that loathing behind a smile. It's the same face, the same eyes. Is that why she's feeling confused? ]
Everyone else contributed so much. Kai...Keiji...you. I'm just a high schooler. Wanting people to work together isn't special.
[He looks back up over the laptop at her as he thumbs the on button. He'd brought that up, partly as a reflexive flare of warning coloration - don't try that on me, not in this moment - and also as... what? He didn't have to tell her, he could have just gone straight to the change of subject.
Panic...? It was there and gone so fast, maybe he imagined it. It's almost funny. It can't be that she's afraid of him no it's... probably that nobody likes being seen through, he sure doesn't. Although... when did he become someone who scares people? They're doing this, it looks like.]
That's the thing... You said everything right. It's a little impressive, actually.
[A little scary as well really, but... knowing that he can pick up on it makes things easier, gives him some (slightly false) reassurance. She's still doing it...]
You don't have to worry, Sara. I'm hardly one to talk, aren't I?
[His tone is reassuring... from his perspective he's giving her an exit ramp out, just like the comment of the eyes. He's not going to pry apart the shell in search of vulnerable flesh... just saying he knows it's there. Unbeknownst to him, he already kind of has. Attack and defense can get muddy and confusing.]
[ It's hard to keep the defensive bite out of her words, and instead she stutters on them. But he's wrong. She says the wrong things, all the time. And if she says anything right its not like Midori said, with her grasping peoples hearts for her own gain. What she's doing right now isn't like that. It's just safer, to say things like this.]
I don't...that's not the kind of person I am. I mean it. I meant all of it. [ She had to. She had to mean every word of it. She was going to escape with everyone, she was going to help everyone, she was going to get Sou out alive, one day, and nobody was going to die yet. And Kanna...Kanna...
Just leave her alone. Stop talking to her. Forgive her. ]
You're not a bad person either, Sou. So just...please. I'm not. Like that. You aren't either.
[Oh hell, what is happening right now. It feels darkly ironic, once again. He'd wanted her dead and he'd wanted this, he'd wanted her to rip off the sheep's clothing and admit everything, have the third act breakdown he ended up doing.]
N-nobody said anything about that...
[Well, he'd implied in his own way that they were both liars with facades. The other thing is... new.]
Ahaha... don't tell me you believed me, in the end.
[It's kind of... starting to hit home, just a tad, that maybe seeing and treating someone as your own personal nemesis... might have one or two consequences.]
Let's... just get back to the dorms, okay?
[Really frantically pressing the conversational exit button right now, like the big red one you have to lift the little glass cap for.]
Edited (not actually pressing any elevator buttons) Date: 2021-10-04 09:01 pm (UTC)
[ He's right, she's not making sense. She's talking to someone who isn't here...
Just...get it together.
It takes a second, and a deep breath and...its gone. Like keeping her head above water. Like letting something go. Something red and crushing shoving it all away, because this isn't the first time Sara's had to deal with this all consuming guilt. The trick is to just never think about it. ]
Right. Right..
[ She's shaken, but she doesn't look scared anymore when she looks at him. Just a normal look of confusion. Her face is still damp, but body is still and calm.]
Believed you? Er...I don't think I'm working with Asunaro, don't worry. [ Of that, she could still be certain. ] The dorms sound nice. I should make dinner when we get back...
[Once again, it all just disappears back into the depths, like water going down a sink... he understands her a little more, he thinks. His mind flicks back to the memorandum, still fresh in memory, and the flash of involuntary comparison makes his skin crawl. Asunaro... that all keeps coming back to her. Obsession with her.
His gaze is away. He doesn't like being seen to cry himself and he can extend her that same courtesy. He looks back down at the laptop to dislodge the thoughts, running a finger over the trackpad to make the mouse go in circles. Looks like it's still working, at least.]
...
[Wait for it...]
...wouldn't say no, if you happened to make too much.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2021-10-04 08:24 am (UTC)Stupid...you're the one who was crying. Isn't it natural I'd ask? [ His long lost sister was before his eyes, wasn't she? Sara leans back against the elevator wall, cocking her head as the smile drops. There's distress behind thoughtfulness. Nothing about her behavior is innately suspicious but it is...wooden, like someone going through the motions. Shock, perhaps. ]
I suppose it was... I'm glad...really. It was nice to see Kanna after so long, even if I was dead. I hope she does well, whereever she is.
[ The lights above them are blinding, but Sara would personally prepare to stare at them for the duration of the trip rather then think anything. This doesn't...change anything. ]
If this is the worst that I can imagine, maybe I am really too stupidly optimistic for my own good?
no subject
Date: 2021-10-04 08:55 am (UTC)[He is not crying ok it's just raining indoors shut up.]
You know, I kept thinking about it back then. Over and over... how people could just listen to you. I think I'm starting to get an idea.
[They were falling for quite a while, the elevator's slow grind up is going to take even longer. He moves from the door, putting a splayed hand up as he passes her and leans over to pick up the laptop from the floor, returning to his position, swiping the dust off it, and tilting it back and forth with the wince-look of someone who knows the fans are probably fucked now. Looks like Kai's... he had taken good care of it, it seemed. Kanna... her idea wouldn't have worked if it wasn't already meticulously clean. He cracks it open for a quick look, the front edge pressed against his middle.]
You're going to hurt your eyes, doing that.
no subject
Date: 2021-10-04 09:07 am (UTC)I didn't...do anything? [ She's picking every word so carefully. He can't know about Ranmaru, or Midori, but somehow she feels like he does. It feels like an accusation. She can still see it, the way Sou looked at her with that loathing behind a smile. It's the same face, the same eyes. Is that why she's feeling confused? ]
Everyone else contributed so much. Kai...Keiji...you. I'm just a high schooler. Wanting people to work together isn't special.
no subject
Date: 2021-10-04 09:30 am (UTC)Panic...? It was there and gone so fast, maybe he imagined it. It's almost funny. It can't be that she's afraid of him no it's... probably that nobody likes being seen through, he sure doesn't. Although... when did he become someone who scares people? They're doing this, it looks like.]
That's the thing... You said everything right. It's a little impressive, actually.
[A little scary as well really, but... knowing that he can pick up on it makes things easier, gives him some (slightly false) reassurance. She's still doing it...]
You don't have to worry, Sara. I'm hardly one to talk, aren't I?
[His tone is reassuring... from his perspective he's giving her an exit ramp out, just like the comment of the eyes. He's not going to pry apart the shell in search of vulnerable flesh... just saying he knows it's there. Unbeknownst to him, he already kind of has. Attack and defense can get muddy and confusing.]
no subject
Date: 2021-10-04 09:44 am (UTC)[ It's hard to keep the defensive bite out of her words, and instead she stutters on them. But he's wrong. She says the wrong things, all the time. And if she says anything right its not like Midori said, with her grasping peoples hearts for her own gain. What she's doing right now isn't like that. It's just safer, to say things like this.]
I don't...that's not the kind of person I am. I mean it. I meant all of it. [ She had to. She had to mean every word of it. She was going to escape with everyone, she was going to help everyone, she was going to get Sou out alive, one day, and nobody was going to die yet. And Kanna...Kanna...
Just leave her alone. Stop talking to her. Forgive her. ]
You're not a bad person either, Sou. So just...please. I'm not. Like that. You aren't either.
ma'am this is a wendys
Date: 2021-10-04 10:06 am (UTC)N-nobody said anything about that...
[Well, he'd implied in his own way that they were both liars with facades. The other thing is... new.]
Ahaha... don't tell me you believed me, in the end.
[It's kind of... starting to hit home, just a tad, that maybe seeing and treating someone as your own personal nemesis... might have one or two consequences.]
Let's... just get back to the dorms, okay?
[Really frantically pressing the conversational exit button right now, like the big red one you have to lift the little glass cap for.]
YEAH?? SHE CAN CRY IN A WENDYS IF SHE WANTS WHAT ARE YOU A COP?
Date: 2021-10-05 04:07 am (UTC)Just...get it together.
It takes a second, and a deep breath and...its gone. Like keeping her head above water. Like letting something go. Something red and crushing shoving it all away, because this isn't the first time Sara's had to deal with this all consuming guilt. The trick is to just never think about it. ]
Right. Right..
[ She's shaken, but she doesn't look scared anymore when she looks at him. Just a normal look of confusion. Her face is still damp, but body is still and calm.]
Believed you? Er...I don't think I'm working with Asunaro, don't worry. [ Of that, she could still be certain. ] The dorms sound nice. I should make dinner when we get back...
understandable have a nice day
Date: 2021-10-07 12:31 am (UTC)His gaze is away. He doesn't like being seen to cry himself and he can extend her that same courtesy. He looks back down at the laptop to dislodge the thoughts, running a finger over the trackpad to make the mouse go in circles. Looks like it's still working, at least.]
...
[Wait for it...]
...wouldn't say no, if you happened to make too much.
[There it is.]